I need a twelve-step program.

My name is Hildy, and I have a problem. I am positively addicted to the Food Network.

Granted, I hardly watch any television at all, but when I do, you can bet it’s Food TV. It’s so addictive! Don't talk to me about 'Lost' or 'Gray's Anatomy' or whatever other crappy shows are hot at the moment. Give me Bobby Flay anyday!!!! Filet mignon, salt-encrusted flounder, homemade popovers---you name it! And I can't walk away. After waking up to my favorite shows on Sunday morning, I went on a rampage and whipped up homemade crepes for breakfast, French onion soup FROM SCRATCH for lunch, and beef fajitas with all the fixin’s for dinner. And I loved every friggin’ minute of it!!!!!

This is not normal. People should not be this happy about slaving over a hot stove all day. But, then again, I certainly never claimed to be even remotely average, so there you go....

On a related note, Martha Stewart, fresh out of prison, has a new “cooking show” whereupon she invites celebrities onstage to ‘cook together’ and proceeds to suck up to them for a half hour. How very cozy. It’s really weird watching her try to pass off this new fake ‘fun-loving’ personality as if its her own. Sorry, Martha, I’ve seen all your old pre-big-house programming, and I know EXACTLY what a stuck-up prima donna you are. You can’t fool me! Hey, Martha, I think you have a bit of chocolate ganache on your nose there. Oh wait, that’s no ganache!

Anyho. Enough about that. I am happy to report that I am once again BACK ON CHOCOLATE. Hallelujah! It’s been a loooong 3 months or so. I’m back, baby!!!!!!!! Nevermind the acid reflux it brung along with it.....we won't talk about that.......

If you’ll excuse me, all this ganache-talk has given me ideas.....